Daily Inspiration: Meet Emily Greer

Today we’d like to introduce you to Emily Greer

Hi Emily, thanks for sharing your story with us. To start, maybe you can tell our readers some of your backstory.

I was the only female child in a family where the harsh aspects of masculinity were revered as a result of my parents internalized and excessively compounded shame. How can a blind man leave me anywhere but off the cliff?

I recognize that they were simply working with whatever tools they reliably got their hands on. Personally, I feel my children deserve more than this. I feel every child- every inner child- deserves more than the allotment I was assigned.

I remember being eight years old, waking up from nightmares night after night and immediately thinking, “OMG is tonight the night I suffocate on my own lungs?”. Hey, don’t you think it’s interesting that my asthmatic flare-ups centered around the gravitational pull of my dad’s frustration at his un/improperly expressed emotions? As a child, I had already resigned to a life of living in the echo of my family’s trauma responses while I felt The air was so thin, I’d never be able to scream my way out of this.

I developed insomnia at age 9. I remember staying up so late that Cartoon network flipped over to adult swim. Heck sometimes I would watch the 700 club just to have a companion. Later that same year, I wrote “mom divorse dad” in one of my Hello Kitty spiral bound notebooks to find my dad stole that line, saying he had no idea how to spell divorce.

I share all of this with you to outline the path I have walked (honestly, let’s consider all of those extra hours of wakefulness Em has been privy to). I share a glimpse into my path to show you that anybody can develop these integral self observational skills and make new realities out of recycled pieces of our pasts.

I feel as though I have been prepped and primed through trial and tribulation to grant you a sense of peace as you walk the more tumultuous aspects of your personal path. It brings me great joy to offer my expertise as a way of granting you a torch in the midst of the darkness.

My life’s work is dedicated to vocalising the struggles of overturning unjust power structures and illustrating a personal quest towards moderating the abuse of power through considering subjectives and employing consistent change. This is how I came into my role as a seer, a mother to all, a confidant, a Christ consciously aware safe space for any and all to exist presently.

I am honored to witness.

I’m sure it wasn’t obstacle-free, but would you say the journey has been fairly smooth so far?

I’ve run into many a road block! And I am grateful I have been gifted the opportunity to integrate wisdom. I always say: “The answer is in the polarity.” because often we find that, like an inoculation: balance is crafted from both aspects of any problem. Trial and tribulation are equally as necessary to our path as joy-filled celebration. Therefore, I share all of this as a means of detailing the tragedy of my childhood and in hopes of encouraging you to take command of your own relationship with your inner child and be the parent you always needed.

Growing up, our best family friends had four boys. I already had two brothers. By December, the youngest turns 25, I 27, my older brother 28. Being raised around 6 tyrants who spoke with their fists unless they intended to verbally abuse the tears out of you, I had to grow up quick. I didn’t get your average girly life of rainbows and puppies and unicorns because my webkins were getting drowned in the pool while I sobbed.

I remember being 13 and pulling up into their driveway – -rushing out of the car and being greeted with this disgustingly wet rain… trust me, i wasnt expecting to be splattered by frog guts that day. Boys will be boys, right? Yeah, boys will be murderers who get frog guts in your ponytail on your average summer night, right? It’s totally normal to hunt frogs with a fire cracker in the other hand so you can bathe and frog blood on the new moon – right?

Obviously there were some issues regarding emotional regulation amongst the boys. Most of them pertain to their pervasive draw toward physically harming each other and any small child (me) who threatened their psychopathic tendencies.

What with my father being diagnosed narcissistic and unmedicated due to utter refusal, it surprised no one when he painted dead on the entry way wall in red paint. Was I supposed to look to this guy for protection? Billy Mays himself dare not coerce me to pay pentacles of my self worth to a man who crosses his fingers as he shakes your hand. I was severely bullied for showing even a minuscule amount of emotional disregulation. Ask my dad to protect me? You can call me a lot of things, but stupid is not one of them.

I understood from a very young age that my father was acting out the role of a parent. It was as if we were still playing George and Zuzu Bailey from “It’s a Wonderful Life”, which we did together for the local theater guild when I was 6.

I became excessively aware of my fathers increasing negligence whenever he (quickly) remarried a known drunk and pawned all the kids off on me. As a child, I raised her 2 children, my little brother and emotionally regulated and played the part of the fool for my golden child of an eldest sibling. I often took the blame for things because older brother convinced me “that’s what good people do”. I remember his eyes looked so charmingly calculated yet imposing, almost as if he were seeing all the blame future em shouldered her entire life in that moment.

And since I already had everything taken from me, at least I still had fight in me to protect them. My stepsisters had this stupid little joke they thought was funny: they called me Cinderella and then moaned about how they were the ugly step sisters. Meanwhile I prayed to somehow become so teeny tiny – I would disappear from sight altogether. I prayed to somehow become one of the ugly stepsisters as I cried silently in my bed at night as to not wake my step sister who couldn’t bear to sleep in a room by herself because she was too afraid.

I had the immense pleasure of creating life of my own by having my first daughter at eighteen. “Eighteen is very young!”, you might say. “How did you cope with your past so quickly?”… And I’ll be damned if I don’t give all the credit to my children. It is only in looking at myself through their eyes that I finally recognize how much hostility, hatred and insensitivity I’ve harbored all these years.

So there I was, finally present with Serendipity (now 8 years old) and that’s when the real challenges started happening. That’s when life intensely pulled me between do and die. My entire existence lived with less than an iota of space to myself and suddenly I’m back in my trauma all over again.. ROUND 2…

I only knew a reality where I wasn’t allowed to simply exist in the family dynamic. And you know what? I want better for my daughters. Even if that means I have to dig to the core of the Earth with my own 2 hands. Even if I have to look in the mirror and look my ugly in the eyes and invite her to lunch. Even if I have to sit in my own fear to the point of sweating the bullets my dad never shot.

That’s with a heavy handed father, we have the alternative which is the histrionic mother, who focused her aim on beauty, seduction, physical comforts… and a facetious relationship with Christ built on the depths of a few peak experiences, 3 tbsp of self denial, 4 cups of projection, a splash of hypocrisy and an mean case of stygiophobia. If it isn’t clear yet, my mother never learned how to emotionally regulate. My mom knew how to give her love language and have that mirrored back to her.

Therefore as the eldest (and by far the only capable) young woman in the house, I was consistently forced to emotionally regulate my abusers and often ended up being everyone’s punching bag.

I was raised as a boy and expected to integrate softness. I was a child leading children. And having my own children has certainly been my greatest joy, alas having to raise children alongside my healing hasn’t been an easy road to navigate. I feel the persistent fear of never having enough time drip down my spine like someone cracked an egg on my head. At some point in my life, the OCD forced me to consistently wash my hands of this. Mental health challenges, financial insecurities and unnecessary pressure was tossed upon my shoulders.

I felt as though I never had any time or space to discover what it meant to be an adult separate from the responsibility of another being’s life. Let me be your reminder to practice gratitude for the opportunity to choose. At this moment we all have two options. We can choose to see the destructive and all consuming nature of our blood and bone, or we can see the laborious hours committed to tracking down the densest parts of our shadow and asking for her hand. The shadow is what tells us we matter. Despite the flaw- despite the words of the word, our shadow proves we are matter. The shadow proves that we are granted the opportunity of free will and expression. Be thankful for your shadow or else you become one sided once more.

My eldest child is named Serendipity after a poem I wrote almost 15 years ago. It’s a love letter from Patience, who gently passes the time by crafting beautiful rhymes until they can join the recipient, Serendipity once more – on her terms. I am honored to be so blessed by happenstance and I take that relationship very seriously.

Alright, so let’s switch gears a bit and talk business. What should we know about your work?

The marriage fact and fiction: complete with all their dirty secrets! My work makes it impossible to ignore universal truths by planting seeds of truth wherever possible. Sometimes this means I have to call myself out in the middle of my lie- go to great lengths to explain how I have allowed the festering in the past- means my present forthcoming nature has space to fruit. Sometimes this means an entire poetry collection takes you through a nervous system regulating practice of breathing. Sometimes this means you need auditory stimulation, or an immersive visual experience, or journey through changing your linguistics. Look: If we are meant to work together, fabulous. Let’s break all those stained glass ceilings. You’ll never look back.

If you aren’t ready to look in the mirror and sit with suffering, then my work is only good in passing. If you’re ready to deep dive into your own soul, let’s go.

Though it can be very hard modeling positive behaviors to barbarians who have no clue they are the infamous bulls terrorizing local china shops, I take up my cross.

The spirit has rewarded my efforts with such an intense set of spiritual gifts, that I feel like I’m wrapped in a golden orb of protection. The only catch is: I have to keep doing that which I’ve set out to do with my practice. To have these gifts and use them merely to benefit myself is to forsake Serendipity.

In my practice I help others find their particular avenue of self expression while also safely and healthily discovering personal boundaries in every realm. I help you express yourself by giving you a workable framework. The most common avenues of personal discovery I use to calculate for my clients includes: learning style, love language, personality type, enneagram, astrological chart, human design chart, blood type, medical history, communication style and attachment style. Together we walk hand in hand to solidify your capacity for self recognition through creative writing challenges, some fairly specific and thought provoking perception questions, art therapy, mild exposure therapy, cognitive behavioral therapeutic practices, linguistic upgrades, formulation of proper boundaries, nervous system balancing practices and challenging your consistency. We integrate this through accessing the reticular activating system to retrain sensory recognition and to promote subliminal reprogramming of the habits we seek to retrain.

And I must say- it is truly an honor to facilitate this kind of growth. My mother loved this verse Jesus spoke,

 “If you love me you will obey me.”

It has been an honor to obey my intuition; to model these behaviors and see the legacy of my mirrored kindness ripple out around me. Please, It only costs free fitty for you to take any of these words, any of these stories, any of these truths and share the ideology with your neighbor. Truth rings, and Ezekial says it is our duty to speak on what we see. If we love God, we naturally fall in step with him and the purpose for our lives.

The only legacy I seek is that my kindness trickles down through my dearly beloved- to their beloved- to their children- to their children’s beloved- and drips into the darkest repressed places we feel deserve no breath. As my dearly departed Gran said to me in a dream once, “Don’t forget to water your family”.

How do you define success?

My feminine aspect declares success be the ability to take rest in my rest. To truly let go of need for trust or hope or expectation. To desire nothing.

My masculine side defines success as knowing from an integrated point of view (having considered the subjective realities) which action is inclusive, considerate and effective. Success is patient and understanding. Success is led by my consideration of my options and earned through my “Art of War” mindset.

Pricing:

• Coaching 1 on 1 through the Icarus Program $250/mo
• Comprehensive Astrological Chart Reading $200
• Consultation $60/hr
• Spiritual Gifts Analysis $250
• Documents on astrology/linguistics $15-$70

Contact Info:

• Website: https://Www.puddleofsunshinespiritualguidance.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/emfamous134/profilecard/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/KQJMmE9JkGFiKTrr/
• Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/1aa9imn12P2BY7Qd78Ikcd and https://open.spotify.com/show/1TMQmYNuzFCRiWZocGUUNe
• TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dilemmemily
• Threads: https://www.threads.net/@emfamous134
• Other: https://patreon.com/PuddleofSunshine

Image Credits
@emfamous134 on insta