Today we’d like to introduce you to Holly T. Ashley.
Alright, so thank you so much for sharing your story and insight with our readers. To kick things off, can you tell us a bit about how you got started?
My story really began over forty years ago, after I experienced abuse myself. At the time, I had no idea that what I had survived would one day become the very place from which God would call me to serve other women.
I began in Arizona, where my background in research psychology and forensic psychology eventually intersected with victim advocacy, domestic violence work, counseling, court advocacy, and legislative reform.
Early on, I presented a five-page plan of domestic violence solutions to a friend who served in the Governor’s cabinet. That plan opened the door for me to serve on the Governor’s domestic violence task force, and much of that work became part of the foundation for what is now the Arizona Coalition Against Domestic Violence.
I also had the privilege of working through the Governor’s Office for Women as Arizona passed its first domestic violence law.
Over the years, I have worked with victims, offenders, courts, shelters, law enforcement, churches, and families. I have sat with women in crisis, walked them through courtrooms, helped them safety plan, advocated for children, trained service providers, written curricula for court-mandated programs, and studied the patterns of abuse from both a psychological and spiritual perspective.
But my work has never been only professional. It has always been personal, biblical, and deeply rooted in the conviction that God cares about justice, truth, repentance, restoration, and the protection of the vulnerable.
My husband, Pastor David Ashley, and I founded Cross Strength Ministries before we moved to Tennessee. Through Cross Strength, we serve victims of domestic and sexual abuse, provide court and crisis advocacy, offer biblical discipleship, and also work with offenders through certified batterer intervention. Our mission is not simply to help people survive crisis, but to point them to redemption, restoration, and recovery through Jesus Christ.
I am also a published author and speaker on domestic violence, women’s ministry, biblical womanhood, marriage, discipleship, and the ways both culture and the church have failed women, families, and victims. My latest book, Barefoot, Naked, and in the Kitchen, has just been released. It is a fun, biblical look at marriage, ministry, and menopause — with plenty of truth, humor, and conviction woven throughout.
Where I am today is the result of God taking what was once broken and using it for battle. I did not set out to build a ministry or become an advocate. I simply kept walking through the doors God opened, telling the truth, refusing to be silent, and choosing to use my story to help other women move from “Victim to Victory,” (that book will be out at the end of this year).
Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way. Looking back would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
No, it has not been a smooth road.
I do not think anyone who does this kind of work can honestly say it has been smooth. Advocacy is beautiful, but it is also costly. You are walking with people through some of the darkest moments of their lives, and that requires more than compassion. It requires endurance, discernment, courage, and a willingness to tell the truth even when it is not popular.
One of the greatest struggles has been watching broken systems fail the very people they claim to protect. I have seen victims do everything they were told to do — call the police, file reports, seek orders of protection, show up to court, tell the truth — only to be dismissed, minimized, or sent back into danger. That is a hard thing to witness repeatedly.
Another struggle has been confronting the misunderstanding around domestic violence, even within churches and communities that should know better. Too often, victims are told to forgive before anyone has demanded repentance. Women are told to be quiet when they are crying out for protection. Families are told to keep the peace when what they really need is truth, accountability, and safety.
There have also been personal struggles. This work takes a toll. It affects your heart, your time, your family, your finances, and sometimes your reputation. When you are willing to confront abuse, expose failure, and advocate boldly, not everyone applauds. Some people would rather protect institutions than protect victims.
But none of that has made me quit. It has clarified the calling.
The difficult road has taught me that justice matters, truth matters, theology matters, and courage matters. It has also taught me that healing is not found in pretending evil does not exist. Healing comes when evil is brought into the light, when victims are protected, when offenders are held accountable, and when the Gospel is applied with both compassion and conviction.
So no, it has not been smooth. But it has been sanctifying. God has used every battle, every closed door, every betrayal, and every hard lesson to sharpen the work and deepen my dependence on Him.
As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about what you do?
My work sits at the intersection of domestic violence advocacy, forensic psychology, biblical counseling, offender accountability, and women’s discipleship. Although through the years I did try to remove myself from the abuse/assault field, working as an Operations Leader for large organizations, I always got called back to duty in the field.
Professionally, I specialize in domestic and sexual assault advocacy, crisis and court advocacy, behavioral analysis, program development, and training.
My academic background is in research psychology and forensic psychology, and over the years I have worked in domestic violence shelters, behavioral health settings, high-risk youth programs, court-related advocacy, and community education.
I have also written curricula for court-mandated programs, including domestic violence training, victim advocacy, and batterer intervention.
Through Cross Strength Ministries, my husband and I serve in several areas: victim advocacy, domestic and sexual assault services, biblical discipleship, offender intervention, evangelism, writing, training, and publishing.
Cross Strength Ministries currently reaches thousands of people each month across the country through ministry, advocacy, education, and outreach.
I am probably best known for being direct, biblically grounded, and unwilling to separate truth from compassion. After a very difficult and long trial, one of my clients told me that watching me navigate the judicial processes (and the egos), was like Erin Brockovich meets Jesus.
I have spent decades working with victims, but I have also worked on the offender side through batterer intervention. That gives me a very clear understanding of both trauma and accountability.
I do not believe we help victims by minimizing evil, and I do not believe we help offenders by excusing sin. Real restoration requires truth, repentance, protection, justice, and the Gospel.
What I am most proud of is not a title or a credential, although I am grateful for every door God has opened.
I am most proud that I have stayed in the fight. I have sat with victims in crisis, challenged broken systems, written programs, trained others, confronted offenders, elected officials, judicial officers, and legislators, encouraged women, and continued to point people back to Christ when the work was hard, costly, and often misunderstood.
What sets me apart is that I do not approach this work as theory. I have lived it, studied it, worked it, taught it, written it, and built programs around it.
I bring professional training, decades of advocacy experience, and a deeply biblical worldview to the table. My goal has never been simply to help people cope. My goal is to help people stand firm in the gospel as commanded and move toward redemption, restoration, recovery, and obedience to Christ.
Can you talk to us a bit about happiness and what makes you happy?
My husband makes me happy.
That may sound simple, but it is the truth. Pastor David Ashley is my greatest earthly blessing, my best friend, my favorite person, and the one who makes even ordinary days feel full. We have built a life of ministry, marriage, laughter, hard work, road trips, faith, and service together — and I do not take that for granted.
What makes me happy is sitting beside him, serving with him, watching him teach, preach, disciple young men, coach students, and lead with both strength and tenderness. I love the way he makes me laugh, the way he steadies me, the way he challenges me, and the way he keeps pointing our life back to Christ.
I am also happiest when I am doing what God has called me to do — writing, speaking, teaching women, fighting for justice, and helping people move from brokenness toward redemption, restoration, and recovery. I love watching women remember who God created them to be. I love seeing truth bring clarity, courage replace fear, and Scripture cut through confusion.
Godly women friends make me happy too. There is something deeply beautiful about women who love Jesus, tell the truth, pray hard, laugh loud, refuse to flatter sin, and still know how to sit beside you in the hard places. Those friendships are a gift.
The fact that God counted us worthy to be in ministry makes me happy.
A good road trip, a quiet beach, a stocked kitchen, a strong cup of coffee, and a good laugh all help the happiness factor too.
But at the center of it all is gratitude. I am happiest when I am fully aware that every good thing in my life is grace. My marriage, my calling, my story, my friendships, and even the hard roads God has redeemed — all of it reminds me that joy is not found in ease. Joy is found in Christ, and in the gifts He graciously gives along the way.
Pricing:
- Barefoot, Naked, and in the Kitchen is available now in paperback for $14.99.
- Speaking engagements, women’s ministry events, workshops, and conference teaching are quoted based on the event size, location, preparation involved, travel, materials, and ministry needs.
- Cross Strength Ministries also accepts donations and sponsorships to help support domestic and sexual assault services, justice work, biblical discipleship, offender intervention, training, and community outreach.
- For booking, ministry support, or sponsorship information, readers may visit CrossStrengthMinistries.org or HollyTAshley.com.
- All curricula and training for ministries wanting to become service providers is available at CrossStrengthMinistries.org
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.CrossStrengthMinistries.org
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hollytashley
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mrsdavidashley
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hollytashley
- Twitter: https://x.com/HollyTAshley1
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@pastorofpump
- Other: https://www.hollytashley.com
