We recently had the chance to connect with Lindsey Plevyak and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Lindsey , thank you so much for joining us today. We’re thrilled to learn more about your journey, values and what you are currently working on. Let’s start with an ice breaker: What makes you lose track of time—and find yourself again?
Absolutely traveling. Spending time in new locations, cities, having new experiences. I spent very formative years living as somewhat of vagabond, so there’s an odd comforting feeling in being mobile. I absolutely need solitude and quiet retreat, with less stimulation to regroup- but that amount of recovery time is very small. I truly think I could keep going and going on travel trips. Somehow my legs are capable of walking 30 thousand steps without fatigue. It’s like the nuance is fueling my body in the way nothing else can. When I am in a new city, I find a thousand versions of myself, and life feels expansive again. Like anything is possible. Like when we were kids…
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
Well, this introduction is a little different then the last time I was interviewed here, and hopefully it will resonate with someone out there. I spent the last 15 years as professional photographer and creator for major brands artists and influencers. Although I deeply enjoy creating for other artists and helping bring their visions to life, I always felt very limited behind the camera.
About 7 years ago I pivoted and built a personal brand that allowed me to be able to step into my love of influencing and empowering others to do the same. Through this business and brand I had access to becoming a director in an affiliate company- this welcomed things my heart had always craved, coaching, leadership and speaking opportunities. I started my own podcast, In It, about being in the challenging process of creating something significant.
Unfortunately, about 20 months ago I had full blown mental breakdown resulting from a lot of what transpired over the course of those 7 years. Its funny, you have can have a lot of success, but if you don’t have the interior structure to support it, it will more than likely cost you a lot- don’t let it be your health and your peace. It’s not worth it.
I’ve spent the last (almost) two years away from work focusing on creating the inner support necessary for future endeavors. It’s been the most challenging work I’ve ever done, but the most at peace I’ve felt in a long time. I know that there is more that I want to bring into the world, and I want to have the healthy capacity to execute it.
Amazing, so let’s take a moment to go back in time. What breaks the bonds between people—and what restores them?
You know, this is something I’ve been sitting with a lot recently, how relationships truly become fractured and where we are losing are ability to relate to one another. Things seem to be only getting more tense, more heightened and more strained. It feels most days we’re in a pressure cooker and we’re all just doing our best to not completely blow our lids, am I right? But I think when it comes to dealing with people, we have to be able to admit that we are more alike than we are different.
Of course, different ethnicities, culture, background, experiences, how we were raised, can fundamentally impact our abilities to connect. And only naturally, misunderstandings within these parameters can be cause for separation amongst people.
Where bonds break, -I believe- between people , are when we allow the fears of our differences to take the driver’s seat. Our fear that something could possibly challenge our view of the world can be too much to handle. And that’s where the toxic force of pride can insert itself. We use pride to cope with our insecurity that arises from those views being challenged. And pride will ultimately sever relationships with people time and time again. That “our way” is “the way” is some of the most destructive thinking we can have. There’s no humility to be found in a spirit of pride. Humility suggests that would could be incorrect. I believe now more than ever, it’s getting hard to find humility.
If we could truly be humble and honest enough with ourselves, I think we’d find we are more alike than we realize.
At the core of humanity, we want the same things. To both give and receive love, needs for safety, the ability to express and become who we long to be. We all dream, or once did. We long for a future that provides joy, hope and peace. We have the same beating hearts.
I believe bonds can be restored between people when there is finally allowance for our differences to exist. We don’t even have to accept the differences, but can we allow them? When we stop trying to make people come to our side of the street, we subdue the fear we have to sacrifice our own world view. We learn there is space for both: your side and my side. Neither is right or wrong, it simply is.
I believe this can restore any broken bond. Because its rooted in freedom. Something we all inherently desire…
What have been the defining wounds of your life—and how have you healed them?
Man the heavier hitter questions! I’m here for it.
I think a core wound for sure has been linked to a belief of an inherent deficiency, like something is missing. How I think that manifests is along the lines of- something is inherently wrong with me = being more of a loner, or accepting low hanging fruits in relationships. Not enough-ness = the pressure to prove myself alongside the desire to be chosen. Misunderstood= the need to over explain or always being on the outside of social circles etc, groups etc.
All of that combined created a self abandoning people pleaser. Aka a miserable human being. When we believe we are missing something, we’ll spend a life time trying to search for what we believe to be missing. That resulted in a life constantly chasing temporary feelings of joy that felt like permanently solutions. It will be a life spent proving your worth because your validation is outside of yourself. It will mean sacrificing your own personal needs to accommodate the needs of others. It will look like making yourself smaller to make others more comfortable with your presence. And all of that combined will create chronic disappointment because you’re not actually living.
After years of doing all of the above, I finally came to the realization that the only thing missing from my life was me. Realizing that I was not the things small minded people told me I was- that I didn’t need to prove anything to anyone but myself. And whatever was not meant for my life would exit, and what was meant to be would stay. There was so much freedom in accepting that truth.
And also releasing the pressure to please everyone around me. Allowing myself to disappoint people. To actually prioritize my own care before extending it to another. I think as artists there is this inherent bent to sacrifice, to pour yourself fully into anything you do: people, your work, a role, etc. It really hard to choose you. I found that when I chose myself first, I had greater bandwith and less consequences when it came time to pour myself into my work.
My faith in Christ lead me back to those answers, to the truth of who I was, who I am, and who I am meant to be.
So a lot of these questions go deep, but if you are open to it, we’ve got a few more questions that we’d love to get your take on. What would your closest friends say really matters to you?
You know I love this question because I recently just had a conversation with my best friend Bekah. I called her and told her that I needed her to help me process some big decisions. She’s been my closest friend for the last 16 years and probably outside of my husband knows me better than anyone.
I was feeling really torn about a direction for this next season, and as hard as it was to a admit, a little directionless. I presented a few ideas I had about next steps- I truly wanted her insights. I knew if I was close to the deep end she’d have enough loving grace to pull me back to shore with a dose of reality lol.
I was feeling conflicted on whether or not I needed to move. The last few years haven’t been the most ideal and I was really craving a scene change. I processed with her that I thought it might help elicit a creative spark and some fresh wind in my sails. Just new scenery in general is something I crave often, and wanted to know what she thought.
She then proceeded to answer in a way that only someone who would know me deeply could have articulated- she said, “Linds, the scene change seems like the obvious answer. And it very well may do all the things you hope it to- but I know deep down the work you create matters more. When you are connected to something you truly believe in and have a passion for- I’ve seen time and time again it matters less where you are physically.”
As she spoke I felt the hot tears fall down my face.
She was shinning a light on the less obvious element I was skipping over: the work I create mattered more.
After a a long season of loss, I felt more disconnected to my work. She was right.
Shortly after our call I started writing again. And suddenly the pressure to move felt lifted ever so slightly. And I started to feel like change was already stirring within me.
Thank God for best friends.
Okay, so before we go, let’s tackle one more area. What is the story you hope people tell about you when you’re gone?
That I lived deeply and loved people well. That I made them feel something, hope for something. That I challenged the surrounding narratives and offered a different way of seeing the world. I truly tried to always leave people better then when I found them. Even if it was seemingly small, maybe just a lighter spirit, one that felt heard, seen and being deeply understood.
I tried to give people what I felt I never received in life: Being heard, feeling seen and being deeply understood.
And above all, art.
Because art brings hope. And hope is all we need to get through life.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://lindseyplevyak.co
- Instagram: @lindseyplevyak
- Other: In It Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/in-it/id1633525103
In It Spotify Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/2kLKhj1pzwrkJhqGSd1sxx
Image Credits
IN IT cover image by Hannah Corwin design by Lindsey Eryn
All other images by Sadie Kay and Lindsey Plevyak
