Rising Stars: Meet Nadine Shillingford of Bellevue

Today we’d like to introduce you to Nadine Shillingford.

Alright, so thank you so much for sharing your story and insight with our readers. To kick things off, can you tell us a bit about how you got started?
I grew up on Dominica, a beautiful Caribbean island bordered by the Caribbean Sea and the Atlantic Ocean. I was a pseudo middle child. My older brother and sister were five and six years older than me and my younger sister was five years younger. I was a quiet, studious, imaginative, and very sensitive child. I loved to read and draw.

We didn’t have very many art supplies or art lessons so I drew with pencils and crayons. A new pack of multicolored markers was a real treat! I was a good student and graduated high school right after my 15th birthday. I spent the next two years studying A-level chemistry, biology, and mathematics because I was hoping to become a medical doctor like my big brother. But I hated hospitals, blood, and was way too much of an empath to attend to sick people. So by the time, I started college on the nearby island of Trinidad and Tobago, I abandoned my goal of being a medical doctor and started a Bachelor’s degree in computing.

After graduation, I got a partial scholarship and assistantship to attend a university in Michigan, graduating with a Master’s degree in Software Engineering. I was recruited to teach in the computer science department after graduation but left to pursue a Computer Science Ph.D. degree at the University of Notre Dame (ND). Throughout this time I dabbled in art. I discovered oil pastels while I was in Trinidad but nothing serious came of it. After graduating from ND, I got a job at Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology, a rigorous engineering college in Indiana.

By then I was a mom to a four-year-old daughter and keeping up with my courses while juggling a young child was very difficult. Eventually, I left that position and moved to Nashville to work as a cybersecurity engineer. Moving to Nashville was the push I needed to get into art. I worked at a company near Centennial Park. One day, while walking around the lake, I found the Centennial Art Center which offers community art classes. It was the opening I was looking for so I signed up for painting classes. In retrospect, my initial artwork was far from impressive but I was so proud of them.

I made close friends with some of the other students including Alex, Didi, and Allison. I decided to try applying some of the techniques that I learned during these classes to the art of drawing in pencil and found that I had improved in my drawing technique. Then in March 2019, while browsing through Michaels, I found the green Strathmore toned grey sketchbooks with the lightly textured grey paper. I purchased a sketchbook, a few General’s charcoal pencils, kneaded erasers, and white pastel chalk pencils and attempted my first charcoal drawing.

I used a photograph of my niece sitting in front of a mirror in a tutu-like skirt. I fell in love with the combination of black and white charcoal on the paper! I posted the finished drawing on my social media and my friends loved and shared it. An artist advised me to keep working on my technique so I decided to complete a drawing every day for a week. The week went by and soon drawing at night became my daily practice. I looked forward to curling up on the sofa with my sketchbook and pencils. I drew different images of world events. I drew my family. I drew my friends. I drew my pets. I was beginning to feel like an artist.

I started Instagram and Facebook pages just for my art and joined various Facebook art groups like Tennessee Artists and the Nashville Creative Group. Strangers started following my posts and people started asking if my art was available for purchase so I created an online shop. I submitted work for exhibits at galleries and art shows such as Centennial Art Center, Artclectic, and Gordon JCC. Art has become such an integral part of my life.

Being a black, female, immigrant working in a predominantly white male tech field meant that I always questioned myself. But I did not feel that way in the art world that I was building for myself. I felt like I belonged. I felt like an artist. My art practice helped me during the pandemic. I was so terrified and drawing helped me connect to people outside of my home.

I drew images of people in masks, of first responders, of the BLM movement. Art was my refuge. I still work as a cybersecurity engineer but art is what drives me. My friends and I sometimes joke about starting a little gallery, studio, art shop somewhere on an island. Maybe one day.

Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
I haven’t had the smoothest road. In fact, up to this moment, the road is still pretty bumpy. Moving from the Caribbean to the United States was not easy. It was very difficult for me as an immigrant in her 20s to acclimatize to a new culture that expected so much from me even as I juggled post-graduate work, motherhood, and finding my feet as an adult.

My family lived in other states and countries so I never had the opportunity to walk over to a family member’s house as I did in the Caribbean. I missed that terribly. I felt isolated even when I was surrounded by others. Throughout the years, I have faced multiple health challenges including an early-stage breast cancer called ductal carcinoma in-situ (DCIS), Crohn’s with Fistulizing Disease, infertility, and chronic depression. Of all of these, depression has been the one that has impacted me the most.

Mental illness was stigmatized in the Caribbean when I was growing up and there was not much help available. I spent the majority of my childhood and teenage years in a moody whirlwind of emotions. I was able to get therapy and medication when I moved to Michigan and that has helped significantly. However, I am always wary of the next thing that could unravel me. Life events such as my struggles with illness, relationships, post-graduate work, postpartum depression, and my father and niece’s deaths were significant stressors that nearly pushed me over the edge.

Recent events including the pandemic have been difficult. I struggled with panic attacks and severe anxiety during the 2020 shutdown. However, there was a lot of time for self-reflection and I learned a lot about myself during the last year. I learned that I am an empath. I am severely affected by other people’s moods and sometimes fluctuating emotions affect me physically. I’ve had to learn techniques to deal with these kinds of mental challenges. Sometimes it means isolating myself and going it alone.

Sometimes it means reaching out to my loved ones, especially my siblings, mom, and my daughter. Sometimes it means finding my sketchbook and drawing for an hour or two.

Thanks – so what else should our readers know about your work and what you’re currently focused on?
Since 2019, my medium of choice has been charcoal on paper but I occasionally paint in acrylic and mixed media. My charcoal drawings are mostly portraits and studies of the human and animal form. I occasionally use my art to bring awareness to social issues such as race, feminism, cultural issues, and world events. I have an entire series of black history drawings that I will be exhibiting at the Brentwood Library in February for Black History Month.

Otherwise, the inspiration for my artwork can be a song, a person, a historical fact, a pet, a joke, or even something that made me angry. It all depends on the day.

What matters most to you? Why?
My family is very important to me. My daughter is my pride and joy. She is beautiful and intelligent and a great pianist. I love spending time with her. She has the best sense of humor and a great taste in music. We also enjoy similar Bohemian styles in clothes and decor. I love watching her evolve. I am also very close to my mom, siblings, nieces, nephews, aunts, and uncles. I love helping people. I love teaching. I love my art and I love being surrounded by color and visually stimulating things.

I also believe in civil rights for women and minorities. Too many times, society uses religion and historically dominant male ideologies to control others. I will be very happy when women and minorities can enjoy the life that everyone else lives.

Contact Info:

• Email: charcoalattebynsw@gmail.com
• Website: https://charcoalatte.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/charcoalattebynsw/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/charcoalattebynsw

Image Credits
Joseph Cisneros II